Half A World Away

It has been a long time since I last put on my headphone at work and listen to music. I used to do this a lot more in the past, when I wanted to shut myself out from the outside world and concentrate on my work, when I am feeling down, or when I want to have some quiet time with myself.

Right after I got back to office after lunch today, I continued to listen to the CD that I played in the morning - the Earthsongs by Secret Garden, another of my favorite CD series.

The first song that came up is “Half A World Away” – a song that touched me deeply, and I would like to share this with you …

(Composed by Rolf Lovland, Lyrics written by Brendan Graham)

You are half a world away,
Standing next to me,
It seems that everyday,
I’m losing you almost invisibly.
Though you are near,
I can’t reach that far,
Across to where you are,
And so you stay …
Just half a world away.

And I would cross,
The universe for you –
What good would it do,
If you weren’t even there?
Till you return –
Until your way is clear,
I will be here …
Not half a world away.

You’re half a world away,
And no one is to blame –
If love outlives its day,
And turns into an ember from a flame,
I love you as before,
Till worlds will be no more,
Till I can find a way,
To where you stay …
Just a half a world away

And I would cross,
The universe for you –
What good would it do,
If you weren’t even there?
Till you return –
Until your way is clear,
I will be here …
Not half a world away,
You’re half a world away.

Dedicating this song to someone who was once so close ...

The 90/10 Secret

I blew my top this morning, over an incident that happened at home!

I was so affected by the incident that I carried the anger with me even when I was driving to work. My mind was focused on the incident and all the things that this person had done wrong in the past.

I then thought about all the bad things that happened in the last one week, and I lamented about what a lousy week I have. I could feel the frown on my forehead, the angry expression on my face and the tension building up inside me.

My car audio was playing a music CD – Colors of a New Dawn by Gandalf, one of my favourite artists. The soothing and relaxing music must have calmed me. I asked myself, “Why do I get so upset? The incident is really no big deal.” The moment I asked myself this question, the negative thought stopped.

I reflected on what happened and could not believe that I reacted so strongly to a minor incident. I recalled a 90/10 story that a friend sent me sometime ago – a secret that can change our life. Everytime when I over-reacted to a problem, situation or incident, somehow this story would enter my mind after I cooled down.

What is this 90/10 secret that can change our life? 10% of life is made up of what happens to us. 90% of life is decided by how we react to what happens to us.

What does this mean? We have no control over 10% of what happens to us. We cannot stop others from saying something negative about us and we cannot stop the train from arriving late. But the other 90% is different. We control the other 90%! How? By our reaction to the 10%. So what if someone says something negative about me, I don’t care! So what if we are 10 minutes like, no one notice anyway!

Just like this morning, the incident had happened, which I had no control over, but I could have controlled my reaction, by not getting angry with the person and subsequently feeling sorry for myself!

Yes, we can control how we react to what happens around us! Remember the 90/10 secret, do not worry about small matters and we will change our life!

As a matter of fact, I have a good day today. I feel relaxed, I was focused and I accomplished what I set out to do today.

Listen to your heart

These are another 2 of my favorite ZO cards.

"Logic can tell you superficially where a path might lead to, but it cannot judge whether your heart will be in it."
-- Jean Shinoda Bolen

Bigger "Why", Easier "How"

I attended the seminar on The Millionaire Mind Intensive by T Harv Eker over the weekend. This is the 1st time that the seminar was held in Asia and there were close to 5,000 people in the seminar hall.

There were many things to learn and unlearn in this seminar. Many good stories and experiences were shared, our beliefs were challenged and of course we had a lot of fun too.

“The bigger the why, the easier the how” – Harv shared with us one of Jim Rohn’s sayings, and he repeated this many times.

I pondered over this statement for quite a while, thought about my own experiences and could not agree more with this statement – “The bigger the why, the easier the how”.

What does bigger “why” means? Clarity on what we want and why we want it (the purpose). With clarity on our purpose, we will then have the motivation to take action and look for ways to get what we want, thus the easier “how”.

On the other hand, if we cannot answer the “why” or is vague about the answer, then it is unlikely that we know how to move on as we do not know where we are heading and why do we even have to move.

There were many other nuggets that I picked up from the seminar, but for now, “the bigger the why, the easier the how” stick in my mind.

Quotes to live by in 2008

A friend gave me a 2008 corporate planner diary today. I flipped through the diary and I fell in love with it immediately. In addition to the practical use of the diary, there is a meaningful quotation with a nice picture printed on every month.

I read through the 12-month quotations and I really enjoyed it. I am sure you will too.

Jan 08 - You don’t pay the price for success. You enjoy the price for success.

Feb 08 - You will either find a way or make one.

Mar 08 - Seek first to understand then to be understood.

Apr 08 - Well done is better than well said.

May 08 - Cooperation and love together – make everything go smoothly in this world.

Jun 08 - Happiness is a choice that requires effort at times.

Jul 08 - Knowledge speaks, but wisdom listens.

Aug 08 - Knowing is not enough; we must apply.

Sep 08 - You don’t have to be great to start, but you have to start to be great.

Oct 08 - The best thing about the future is that it only comes one day at a time.

Nov 08 - When we have done our best, we should wait for the result in peace.

Dec 08 - It is not the mountains that we conquer, but ourselves.

Don't Criticize, Condemn and Complain

I was at Borders, taking advantage of the year-end promotion to shop for Christmas presents and to stock up my personal library.

The bookstore was packed with people as it was a Saturday, but it did not bother me as I would normally just browse through the books row by row, shelf by shelf, and oblivious to the people around me.

But this time, I found myself interrupted by the scene created by a family. From what I gathered, the teenage daughter wanted to buy a book on a photo editing software, to complement what she learnt in school, but she wasn’t sure what the software is.

The father was impatient as the girl could not answer his questions, so he started reprimanding her, concluding that this must be due to her not paying attention in class, complained that with her such attitude, she would not go far in life, criticize her for lacking her own opinions, not knowing what she wants, not working hard enough, told her she would end up like her mother with not much success in life, etc. Then he complained that the bookstore was messy, people were not civil minded, did not place book neatly, etc.

Throughout the 15 minutes’ episode, the mother was quiet, and the daughter was left alone to fend off her father’s non-stop complaint and criticism, at times she was sobbing. She was obviously feeling embarrassed, angry and at times, rebellious towards her father.

Many of the shoppers, including me, frowned at the scene, but none of us intervened. I felt sorry for the girl, and the mother. I believe this is a common scene in their home, and I wonder what is in the girl’s mind and what would she grow up to be.

I thought about the Dale Carnegie's principles in the book How to Win Friends & Influence People, and I wonder if I also sometimes criticize, condemn and complain.

Dale Carnegie’s Principles
Don’t criticize, condemn and complain, from the book How to Win Friends & Influence People.

Coca Cola's Mission

This is one of my favorite ZO Cards. All of us should also adopt this as our life mission. Enjoy and have fun!